Brett Levanto and his family had never said grace before meals, not regularly, anyway. But what began as a temporary challenge transformed them in small ways.
This year, his daughter decided to start saying grace before dinner during Lent, and he and his wife were encouraging, thinking it would be a nice thing to try out. He was surprised at the effects it had.
“It’s just been lovely. I really dig the way it creates a structure,” says Levanto, 38, who lives in Alexandria, Va., and works for a small lobbying and law firm. “Everyone has to get to the table and be together and not be distracted. We focus on where we are.”
The family sits, holds hands, and takes turns saying a free-form grace. They might say what they’re thankful for, or speak about a sick friend who is in their thoughts. The parents aren’t prescriptive about what a proper grace is supposed to sound like, he says. “If my son’s heart is telling him to thank God for mac and cheese, well, thank God for mac and cheese!”
They all say “amen,” and then dinner is off and running. Although the grace might take less than a minute, it sets a crucial tone. “It creates a grounding feeling — a moment of stillness,” he says. “I feel like our dinners at home are much better now — like, ‘Now we are together, and this is what we’re doing.’ I mean, I’m not going to say we have Rockwellian dinners or any-thing.”