Dr. Agnes Thomas

The Easter season is a great time to reflect on our relationship with chaos and its critical role in our lives. What happened between Passion Sunday and Easter Sunday and the days that followed are prime examples of chaos. The Passion Week showed many facets of life; celebration, praise, agony, abandonment, betrayal, hurt, confusion, and loyalty being misplaced with fear, loss, grief, and disbelief. Though these feelings were centred around a person, they were not experienced by that person alone. Everyone around him felt these motions and emotions one way or another. Some actively participated in it, and others were passive observers. Whether they played a role in it or not, everyone was impacted by the unpleasant and uncontrollable chaos from Gesthamene to Calvary. When Sunday came around, a new type of chaos erupted in the air; this time, it was positive – emotions of many kinds, trying to make sense of everything, trying to affirm oneself of what they are witnessing. There was disbelief, confusion, doubt, celebration, joy, miracles, transformation, re-gathering, and renewal. Though contradictory in how it comes across we feel this joyous and adverse chaos intensely at moments in our life, sometimes with similar emotions, which we have observed at Gethsemane, Golgotha, and then on the way to Emmaus. Does this chaos offer anything? Do we learn anything from it? What is its purpose?
A reflection on chaos and our response to chaos offers much insight into who we are and how we generally approach life. There are also times that chaos does not just happen to us it is around us, as we have seen in the life of Jesus. Sometimes we create it actively to avoid facing a truth or making hard decisions. Regardless of how it takes place, chaos disrupts normalcy, shakes the feeling of having control, and challenges our course of thinking and experience. Not all is lost nor negative in chaos; what we have witnessed at Gethsemane offered a picture of humility and love at its innermost depth. That one image is enough to hold a lifetime of contemplation on how we respond when we feel abandoned and alone at the neediest of our hour. It offers us more questions for reflection, how do we practice forgiveness and offer empathy when we are wronged and thrown into dismay. It also poses a question for us about what we learn from these experiences and how we find the meaning behind them.
Glancing back into history allows us to see leaders who made life-changing choices amidst the chaos that guided their lives and purposes. Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, and Nelson Mandela’s life were shaped by the chaos of race and class discrimination they have experienced and others among them experienced. Their life example offers one of the greatest gifts of chaos: self-awareness leading to and leading from continuous action and reflection. Not being willing to accept the status quo brought more chaos into their lives, but it became a choice as we have seen it. They dared to ask why, and those who chose to ask why continued making a difference as they discovered their intent and response to the disruption caused by chaos.
The lesson from the above examples is that sometimes chaos is necessary, and accepting it is not a sign of weakness but courage and purpose. We have the option to face the chaos courageously and use it for a greater purpose. If we don’t respond to the chaos in our lives, we will be consumed by them, constantly disrupted, disturbed, and unhappy, running from one incident to another. Chaos offers us new perspectives and ways to think about ourselves and others in our lives. It allows us to carefully examine how we respond or contribute to the chaos. When we reflect on our daily chaos, if we see ourselves being grounded, content, and growing with each of it, we know it has been good for us. However, if the opposite happens, we know we allow it to control our lives. Taking note of our relationship with chaos will give us insight into how we respond to it and how our lives are positively or negatively shaped.