I do not understand, but I do believe!

P. A. Chacko, S.J.

When I looked at the crucified figure of Jesus of Nazareth I just couldn’t understand one thing. I asked myself why He had to undergo such crucial suffering.

Jesus had said He was the Son of God sent into the world. Did God Almighty’s only son have to suffer such a heinous death? He had claimed that His mission was to save humanity from sin and to liberate them from sinful realities, to bring them human dignity and to make them children of God. If that was so, His Father, the Lord of the universe, could have sent His emissaries to execute the plan. Or, His son Jesus could have worked a miracle to accomplish His mission. After all, the Nazarene worked many a miracle. He turned water into wine, the very first of His miracles. He cured lepers by blessing them. He restored sight to the blind. He scolded devils and chased them out of human beings. Even His tempter, the devil, acknowledged that Jesus was capable of turning stones into bread.

Then, why did He not perform a miracle to save Himself from His enemies? The truth is, for His personal advantage He did not work any miracle. Such was His unsullied integrity!

He knew His enemies were baying for His blood. He was aware that He had many enemies because of the way He was. His very life style was a threat to them. Itinerant preacher He was, He said God was everywhere. God was not only in temples or religious structures. He could be worshipped anywhere ‘in Spirit and in truth.’ Jesus was turning the tables!

So, He was a freelance wanderer who dared to challenge the establishment. His critics, His archenemies, the pundits and keepers of the Mosaic Law felt threatened by this unlettered man from Nazareth from where nothing good could come in their estimation.

They were not only surprised but found their blood boiling when He called them whitened sepulchres whose outside was kept clean and neat while the inside was full of stench and rottenness. He was referring to their hypocrisy.

Jesus spoke what He was convinced of. He said two plus two was four, not five or three. He called a spade a spade. Because He had no fear! He feared no one. And dared all those who lay heavy burdens on the poor and the weak, and those who oppressed the widow and who did not pay due wages to the labourer.

He could walk into the den of sinners and exploiters and challenge them and thereby transform them into decent human beings. So, He was accused of associating with sinners. When the fundamentalists wanted to stone a woman to death in public, because they said she was living a loose life, He dared them to open their own hearts and search therein for any cleanliness. One by one they turned back and made a quick exit. He brought mercy to the sinful woman and told her that there was another way of life, a decent one. She took His word seriously and changed her route. But, His enemies noted and recorded all such happenings for a fitting reply at an appropriate time.

Jesus knew He was confronting evil in people’s minds unleashed into inhuman ways of living and acting. From His walk down through villages and city streets He had gathered firsthand knowledge of people’s lives. How sin was showing its ugly face in sinful situations where the poor of the land (anawim) were exploited and victimized.

He had no political ambition of His own to become an ideal governor or ruler. Nor did He harbour any thought of becoming a popular hero or a leader with mammoth following. Yet, crowds gathered around Him whenever He spoke of God’s merciful love, or about God’s kingdom of fellowship and truth. He had not studied in any theological institute. But He had a deep knowledge of God and God’s way of acting. Jesus explained that to people in simple words couched in parables. He would speak of the lilies of the field or the birds of the air that neither gather nor hoard grains or seeds but God looks after them. In the same way He looks after all with care and love. Jesus assured them that He was the Good Shepherd who would give life for the sheep. They listened to Him and took to heart His simple message and reassuring words.

This was Jesus of Nazareth. A simple and loving person who had human concern with a divine touch! But this was not the way to preach about God, said His critics. He was pushing His own theology. He was upsetting their Sabbath laws. He was misleading common people. He stood in the way of established ways of doing things. He was indeed a threat to the establishment. This was the verdict. Hence, the men of the establishment had to remove Him before things were getting too intolerable. Away with Him! They roared like the lions of imperial Rome.

They managed to make an underhand deal with one of His own followers to betray Him. They bribed the ring leaders of the masses and won over witnesses to say that He had blasphemed against God. So, in the eyes of religion He stood guilty. They made the public crowd shout, away with Him. He deserved death. The religious pundits, lawyers and their gang had their way.

Finally, Jesus stood condemned. He had to die. For that He had to carry His own cross through the city street up Golgotha hill. There He was stripped naked and crucified between two criminals. He was considered the worst criminal in the eyes of Jewish leaders.

That was the way of the world. The triumph of evil! The reign of darkness! The darkness of diseased minds! For which Jesus, the Son of God, had to pay a heavy price, with His own life in the most heinous way.

I still do not understand why Jesus had to die this way. It is a mystery. A mystery hidden in the heart of God the Father who allowed this tragedy! That is where my faith is. My faith in this tragedy where I believe that God willed it for the salvation of humanity and for the liberation of the universe from the clutches of evil forces! Beyond my understanding or intellectual perception!

I do not believe that death is the last word. Beyond death there is life. That is what this honest Nazarene teaches me because He said: I have come that people may have life, life in abundance. And He practiced what He preached.

Thus, when He resurrected, He proved His words correct that beyond life and suffering there is resurrection and life. I do believe, Lord!

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